Facing Downsizing Overwhelm
Welcome back to Ask Cathy: Real Home Organizing Advice! Each month, I tackle your toughest organizing challenges with practical solutions (and a little humor). If you're experiencing a downsizing mental block, feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or just don't know where to start, you're not alone—I'm here to help.
Understanding the Downsizing Mental Block
Reader Question: How can I stop being paralyzed by the thought of downsizing?
Dear Cathy,
My husband and I have lived in our home for 40 years. Now that we're downsizing, I don't even know where to begin. Every drawer, every closet, every box in the basement feels overwhelming. Every time I try to start, my brain feels foggy and just shuts down. My husband keeps saying we need to get moving, but the thought of going through everything makes me want to crawl back into bed. How do we start without feeling totally paralyzed by this downsizing mental block?
Sincerely,
Buried in Memories
Dear Buried in Memories,
Oh my, do I understand that feeling! I've helped many folks in your situation. I've often seen their deer-in-headlights expression. Here's something I've learned in my 10 years of organizing: that shutdown feeling isn't laziness—it's your brain's natural response to being asked to make too many decisions at once. What you're experiencing is completely normal - you're trying to mentally process 40 years of possessions simultaneously, which is simply beyond what the human brain can effectively manage. This impossible mental task is the root of your downsizing mental block or decision fatigue.
I remember helping my client one time. She had a basement full of holiday decorations spanning four decades and literally sat on the basement steps crying when we first walked down there. Three weeks later, we were reviewing her neatly organized "keepers" and laughing about how she'd been holding onto eight ceramic Christmas trees from the 60's "just in case hers broke."
My Tips to Overcome Downsizing Paralysis
Here's what works for people who feel exactly like you do right now, and are experiencing a downsizing mental block:
Use the "Spotlight Technique"
Imagine your attention as a spotlight that can only illuminate one small area at a time. Practice deliberately moving this spotlight to just one drawer or box, keeping everything else temporarily in darkness. This mental technique helps bypass the overwhelm by consciously limiting what you're processing at any given moment, making decisions manageable again.
Trick Your Brain into Starting
Since you say your brain fogs up before you can even begin, here's a little trick: the night before, decide on one tiny task—like sorting one small drawer. Write it down. Schedule a specific time. When that time comes, tell yourself, "I can stop anytime I want after I start." Then count down from 3, and go! Once you're in motion, it's much easier to continue.
Shrink Your Focus: Small Steps to Big Results
Forget tackling an entire room or even a closet. Pick something tiny—one shelf, one drawer, or a single box. Give yourself permission to work in 10-minute chunks. I call them "turtle steps"—slow, small, but definitely forward.
Start with the No-Brainers
Always begin with what I call the "no-brainers" like expired medications, broken items, old catalogs, instruction manuals for appliances you no longer own. I once worked with a client who had saved eight of those large yellow page phone books "for emergencies." Even she had to laugh when we pointed out she hasn't used a phone book in fifteen years.
Pause and Recharge
When you feel that mental fog coming (and it will), that's your cue to take a break. Pour yourself a cup of tea, look out the window, and give your brain a rest. This isn't a race.
Asking a Friend for Help
Bring in a friend for perspective. Consider inviting a friend with a good sense of humour to sit with you. Sometimes just having someone there to say, "Really, Carol? Six identical black sweaters?" can break the tension and help you see things more clearly.
Focus on what you'll gain – more time, more space, and more!
Think about the extra moments you'll have without the burden of too much stuff. Consider how much easier your move will be with fewer boxes. Ask yourself, 'Will this item simplify my life, or complicate it?' You'll be grateful for every item you decide to let go.
Be Kind to Yourself Through This Process
It's perfectly normal that this takes time – you've built a life here, after all! Each small step is a win, and you're moving past that downsizing mental block.
Warmly,
Cathy
In and Out Organizing
P.S. Do you have an organizing challenge you'd like me to tackle? Submit your question, and I may feature it in an upcoming post!
If you're in the Toronto area and need a steady hand to guide you through this journey, I'd be happy to sit down with you. Having an experienced, objective helper makes all the difference. Get in touch with me at In and Out Organizing for a free 30-minute consultation, and let's create a simple, manageable plan that works for you.
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